Waiting for the words,
which will let me know the fate of us.

this place has been relatively untouched i must say.
probably due to my busy schedule and lack of things to say.

2011 was a heck of a year. but which year isnt a heck of a year aye.
getting into army, meeting new people, meeting a new person (:
seeing people around me suffer, people crumble, in pain
learning to be there for others more than usual, to help when i do not need to, when im suffering too
to accept things for as they are, trying to improve the system, hating my own judgemental system,
regret having regrets,having doubts, resolving my doubts, developing a steely resolve to commission - have my parents put the ranks on my shoulders, learning more about myself.

The year has been good for me in terms of music. Although i missed 3 concerts which i would have died to go for. I did buy CDs for once, remembering some words a friend of mine left to me in 2010.
Mayday Parade, The Cab, The Maine. Albums to dream about making. To dream while listening.
Trance was discovered. It was enjoyed.
Writing a song for christmas which is actually listenable, developing dreams.

helplessness, sadness, pain are just some of the feelings i know i'll feel this new year
but its always about how you pick yourself up.
i do hope i can be a pillar of strength to myself, my girlfriend, to my best friends, to the people around me.
This year i will know that
"You can slip, but never fall. Break that fall and get up again" - Brandon
Inspirational quote of the year. (:

Going into this year as an officer to be. I know i will have more responsibilities. Game on.

Another weekend's gone just like that.
BMT is ending soon, and oddly im more sad than happy.
Im just not sure what lies ahead, its prolly gonna be more crazy. And the fact that my good buddies wont be with me in the next stage of army life.
Haha. But guess that's life aye.

And surprisingly, i had like more fun last night than i did on other nights partying. even though there was less alcohol. Haha.

Back to camp.

Check out memories by Panic! at the disco when the new album comes out!

wow am i tired. I think im going to be sleeping soon.
but honestly i felt like i didnt party hard enough yesterday. Pfft.
zouk was pretty much empty and phuture was kinda bratwurst-fest
but nonetheless, i had fun luh. its a good break from army

but indeed yesterday was results.
to be honest, im disappointed with myself cause i know that i could have probably done better.
at least for gp and h3. econs, its subjective enough for me to know i did my best.
the feeling of not going up on stage yesterday till the last minute would be one of the worst feelings i have had in my life.
i actually was hoping for 5As and would have settled happily for 4. but with 3As, i'm thankful yet unhappy in certain ways.
doors that would have been open if i had 5 are now closed, so i have to look for a different path in my life.
its just scary yet stupid how you can be super consistent throughout your school year yet not make it out with the scores you've been getting. like how a good friend got B for econs when he deserved an A so badly.
but that's just how exams work i guess.

well i guess its truee that i've 2 years to decide my course, i am still increasingly worried of my prospects of a further education.
overseas is just too ex to self-finance. yet i do want to go overseas if i can. still. things can change. like how im opening up my mind to a possible NTU education when i had closed it off just 2 months ago. if i stay here, i'm definately going to try to take a double degree. i hope its possible.

i guess my friends will have to make similar decisions too. some sooner than others. yet its a tough decision nonetheless

with my bmt haflway done, i'm glad that im almost out of the storm. yet knowing that what lies ahead might be way worse doesnt make me feel any better. yet i suppose thats part of life. just taking it one step at a time.
it sucks though that i can actually spend a day of my weekend alone just kinda sucks. how i went to smu and the AUG uni fair alone. but right now. i gues its just time to focus on army and finding educational opportunities.

Time to serve the nation.
Cut my hair, it feels so different.

I'm still sick but i just love this song too much.
So i did a cover since i got the camera back.
Its quite bleh, but <3 the song.
Seeyou blog. in about 17 days!

As i'm switching to the lousy phone for army, i realise i do have to copy certain contacts into my sim card.
Of course it cant take all the contacts. So question is, whose numbers am i going to copy.
I figure some people dont deserve the space on phone perhaps.
I'll see how it goes.

My Bad Habit by BrannLum

 

( An Original. Lyrics Here )

 

 

 

Bintan was awesome. So was Phuket. And Taiwan.
Singapore is so boring sometimes i just wanna dieeee.
Well not really but yeahh.
I'm pretty happy for myself though. I managed to like, beat off the temptation to try to sheisha and even take a puff of the deadly white stick. It may seem pussy BUT i have my own principles which i wanted to hold on to. And i did it.
HAHA.
Army is coming pretty quick, and it begs the question, whether you'd rather go in, with no one to talk to, without a relationship; or being in a r/s and dying from the apartness.
Curious. But i'll never know.
Oh. P.S. i think its 2 times, i have not remembered how i ended up sleeping. Must have said something i dont remember too. I'm afraid of what i say now. sigh. HAHA.

Party all day and night ^^